And I did it with gusto. I will not be the person I hate.I have a fiery determination and indefinite patience to remain free from smoking. I realize now that my reasons for smoking at that age have twisted themselves into reasons why I was still smoking 16 years later. We love when women change or do things to feed our fetishes. I am going to just be brave and reach out to you through my story because I am so tired. His favorite thing is when I'm standing at the finish line of his 5k with my chubby ass stuffed in yoga pants smoking a cigarette. Take away the cigarette, and blow out the smoke from your mouth. I am slowly coming to realize all the lies I told myself, and believed, just to be able to smoke. at the local hotel a few towns over about once or I would like to say that their home is why I started smoking, although it is not. He wasn't asking me to really smoke, just pretend with unlit cigarettes.So I did that a couple of times, and he seemed to enjoy it. Do you remember the woman you were in 2017, and did smoking really change anything about her? It is only right that I help feed her fetishes tpo And I'm kind of worried that I'm going to keep smoking more, because I enjoy them so much. I was 14 at the time I lit it up and took my first drag and I coughed at first but I kept going and by the time I finished it I loved it . My husband wasn't a smoker when we met. However I started going out with this guy who smoked and I tolerated it for a while then I began trying to encourage him to quit.to no avail, we eventually broke up, but I regretted that, so what did I do - I started smoking to prove that it wasn't an issue, we did not get back together so I stopped just like that, I was not addicted to cigarettes, which is why I cannot comprehend how people get so addicted, I used to smoke between 10 and 15 cigs a day. She tried her aunty's cigarettes and turned into a smoker. Make a podcast, YouTube or TikTok videos about our confessions and we'll promote your content, free! My mom, sister, and I moved to the east coast from California, and I started smoking a couple of months after that. Such a hot topic, so turned on by your story. It's all about finding a way to feed the addiction. He was super into this, and I was into him. I began smoking for one simple reason: everyone around me did it. I'm 24. I started to enjoy it and it started getting cravings so I got Juul. I was kind of freaked at first. So as the morning light rose on the day I decided to start smoking, I rolled over, took a deep breath, put my feet on the. Thank you, {{form.email}}, for signing up. I decided to quit the madness and chaos. And now I am 27 and I still smoke 120s and still have the same feeling. I sat in on a Maggie Dent conference once - Maggie is a child developmental lord who basically teaches you how to understand your children's brains in a way that gives you so much more compassion for their behaviour. I just couldn't stand to be hypocritical and agree with the commercial, and then sneak a smoke. Did your voice become deeper and huskier since you started smoking? So, before I'd go in the house, I'd go to the garden (if I wasn't already there) and pick rosemary, basil, or any pungent herb. I liked it when she inhaled deep the smoke of her cigaret. I would really like to chat with you, about our feelings and our journey into addiction at such a young age. What's it like to become a full-time smoker? I asked my mother for help. They specialize in catching cheating spouses by hacking their phone to monitor all their communications such as calls, email, text social networks like Facebook, twitter, dating sites and many more. Her little sister was my age and became a smoker herself, and she walked to school in 8th grade every day smoking her cigarette, of and their mother smoked long white cigarettes too. Then, on a Friday night, I don't know why, I tried inhaling. I just have to eat her like an animal I get so turned on. I have a long-time thing or fetish for very long, polished nails on women, the longer the better, and preferably red (darker colors work, too). I was kind of freaked at first. Do you like living a dishonest life? That same week, I took her to a nail salon and told, directed the manicurist to make hers longer and that she liked a gold color, but "see if anything red works, too". A combination of police officers, motivational speakers, and teachers passed out flyers, coloring packets, and fun activities that revolved around the prevention of smoking in adolescents, and the teaching started when I was in elementary school. He doesn't know I looked through the windows of my house to see where he was before going in. Anyway i couldn't get used to them and was going to throw them away when my wife said she would try one. I thought I really lucked out. So what is the French Paradox? What the fuck is wrong with you stupid cunts that bring these old post back to life again?. I too am so adicted to way i smoke very proud of my smoking needs attentive the way i watch other women smoke it just turns me on so much cant help myself erom smoking 2to3 packs a day and trying to smoke a carton ps do i qualify as to be a smoker love from a smoker smoke em babyyyyyyyyyyyy smoke them beyond the filter dont ever exhail, Thats honest smoking im opening to feel sexy im addicted. I started to form the "typical smokers' habits" by observing others, watching movies or ads. All rights reserved. But then, you start to feel increasingly like crap as the years progress. With love. He doesn't know how I wish I could take back every moment that I smoked, just to spend that time with him because I miss him so much. But how far would I go for cigarettes? They would get over it. When I was sitting next to her, she asked me if I would smoke. She asked me to sit with her and drink some coffee. I like to suck the cigarette with moist lips so the long cork filter slides across my lips as I saturate my lungs in smoke. Sometimes I like to watch myself smoke in the mirror. I am 42M and she is 23F. We've talked about that time and she has always said she was hoping for some excuse to smoke again as she missed it with a passion but was too afraid to admit it at the time. Anonymous From an early age I hated smoking, my Dad smoked and the house always smelt horrible and I could hardly breathe when I was at home, I was always very anti-smoking. Sometimes desperation causes us to make bad decisions. Personally, I don't worry about my health. Here's a little story from a guy who reads this blog, his name is Rick, so I thought I would share it. We had a lot of fun that morning and I smoked 5 more, I think. I smoke when I'm full. If you can inhale the smoke, you will feel well and enjoy every cigarette. But my family would disown me. Smoking in secret is a behavior that creates pain and loneliness for the smoker. I am tired of keeping secrets, I am tired of pushing people away, I am tired of being ashamed, and I am tired of being sorry. I asked my sister for help. I was fascinated by plants and trees as medicine for the body and soul. What he doesn't know is that I hid from him. People who fucking love cigarettes from the moment they started. RawConfessions user (Login required), Your Message (please type your comment here). I'll smoke anytime and anywhere. Anyway after quitting for 2 years I met this guy who I fell in love with over night, yes he was another smoker, he did really only smoke at the weekend but that really isn't the point. There is nothing better than starting your day chaining a few cigarettes.. And that's what I thought I was. My mom smoked and at about 13 I started thinking about smoking .my mom was a single mother and she worked afternoon shift a lot and she would leave her circle out so one day I finally got the nerve to try one . Suddenly, it became clear to me and I made the biggest decision in my life. I watch her and get extremely hard. He admitted right away that loved that I was younger and didn't mind that I was a little out of shape. When I began smoking again, I decided I could control it and would only smoke when I drank alcohol. I got lucky. Well, how long can you last without having your first cravings? I even tried myself in regularly going days or months without smoking and used that as evidence I wasn't a smoker. We've know each other for quite a while but only just started dating about 6 months ago. Hiding Behind Smoking, in One Way or Another, The Never-Ending Cycle of Nicotine Addiction, Pathological Demand Avoidance in Autism and Beyond, The Layered Trauma of Losing My Adoptive Mother, Mental Health Impact of Straddling a Dual Identity as an Asian American, Depression Is an Ongoing BattleHere's What I've Learned, Wayne Brady Reveals His Inner Battles Behind the Curtain, Why I'm Opting for a No-Gift Christmas ThisYear, Navigating the Fentanyl Crisis as a Young Person, Whats It Like to be Diagnosed With Autism as an Adult? Thanks, Rick! I don't want to schedule my time around smoking. A friend of mine she also smokes 2 Marlboro 100s in her 10 minute break, needing and loving huge amounts of smoke, she's super hooked but she loves it to no end. I decided to do it. By submitting the form, you acknowledged that you are or over 18 years old and you will follow local policies and laws. Uh, yea.. . My girlfriend smokes about 30 cigarettes a day and although I'm not a smoker, I love the smell of the smoke on her hair and her clothes and her breath - it's a real turn on. My life is sooo ******* sad, ask me anything. Listed here you will locate several of the most popular electronic cigarette companies around the world. Disgusting. After we got married, I thought it would be nice if he could share smokes with me, so I started coaxing him to try it. It's the stuff of star-crossed lovers, young beautiful dummies with their whole lives left to ruin. She has more than likely died from smoking or Covid by now. I'm even more scared about telling my parents. Old ladies who are addicted to smoking certainly are not sexy. So I walked out yesterdaybecause I told him I couldn't handle maybe losing him in years to come to some illness due to smoking which could have been prevented by not smoking, I cannot get my head round why people would willingly posison themselves slowly, it just doesn't make sense to me, although I guess all the smokers on here will say its addictionbut I don't get it because I can stop smoking just like that I don't have any withdrawl symptoms or cravings at all. Hope he dies slow and first. I did too. twice a week she shares my fetishes especially I started out with one a day, then it went to 2 and now 4-5 a day, I love smoking so much. I started smoking cannabis to . It started when I was a little girl of 9 yo. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. My girlfriend loves to smoke when she's pleasuring herself, in fact I think she always smokes then. It makes us feel guilty, weak, and stuck. I was suprised but said yes so I get my first own cigaret. ASSHOLE, Still doing around a pack and a half. When I see meat eaters in public, I get upset and have to smoke weed to calm down. I realize now that my reasons for smoking at that age have twisted themselves into reasons why I was still smoking 16 years later. Sometimes . Starting from studying physical education and sports in high school, to learning about the human mind in orthopedagogy in college. My granny is a sexy woman of 53 yo. Hi filling our lungs as much smoke we can, Anonymous confessions, stories and advice. Perhaps it was.I quit smoking on June 12. She said she feels so sexy. How did you start smoking? But then,inevitably,I would want another cigarette. I'm 36, divorced and have a boyfriend who just turned 50. Thinking of your relationship with smoking as a toxic relationship can help you see just how manipulative nicotine isit plays tricks on the body and mind, convincing us that we need it to feel pleasure. We are sitting at an outdoor bar drinking and she says "I finally got the hang of the smoking, wanna see ?". I was so naive that I had never heard of it. I began when I was 13 and smoke a pack and a half a day of Benson and Hedges. So I kept smoking. And she lit up a cigarette for us to share. Tired of putting the things to your mouth. I am now 31. Well the first two times I had smoked that other substance nothing happened. A friend suggestedmaking a quit date. Of course after eating I had to have a couple more cigarettes needing smoke so bad but enjoying those cigarettes so good. Gf had no problem doing it for me. I would go into the woods near my home, or occasionally "bravely" have one in the house if. I started at 37. I've been working a lot, got a biker bf (who supports my smoking), traveling, and I continue to smoke of course. My mom smoked Salem slims 100 at the time . I've been to Vegas before and that's smoker's heaven, you can smoke everywhere, There's good and bad news! No matter what is happening, good or bad, I can always have a cigarette. It happened so slowly and I see that my mind was playing all sorts of tricks on me. Save. I reflected on the insanity that has become my daily life. And nothing better than a smoking b******* when she smokes a 120. Definitely stupid if you think people cant smell that on you or suspect. I remember at their house one day and she had her first carton of full flavor 100s hooked smoking lots of cigarettes not thinking about the health hazards cause she loves that cigarette way too much. Then, 9 months ago, he told me he had a smoking fetish. She will give me a blow job blowing smoke, My husband wasn't a smoker when we met. What surprised you? She got hooked fell in love with smoking and was taking bigger and bigger puffs and smoking more and more cigarettes every day turning into a full blown chimney. I would deliberately get up before him in the morning and go to bed after him in the evening just so I could smoke. Why not. But he said it was hot. All rights reserved. She did it a couple of times in front of me, and saw what it did to me and said "you really like this alot" I thought that was the end of it, then two months later we go out and she's looking great in sheer blouse and a pushup bra, tight yoga pants over her chubby round ass, rockin' some nice panty lines, hair and makeup done up. I thought it made me look grown-up, but I was shy so I'd do it on my own. Aunty was very patient with me and showed me how to inhale and from that first hit I ever got to my little lungs, I fell in love with the feeling of pumping smoke habitually into and out of my body. It was horrible. It was super awkward, but he told me all the details of it, then apologized and said "don't smoke" He never brought it up again, but I started to notice things he did (and checked his browser history). Even she can hardly believe she's turned into such a heavy smoker in such a short time, she's a thousand times more hooked and in love with cigarettes than she ever thought was possible, she thrives on heavy smoking and can imagine it any other way, and now it's time for a cigarette! I know smoking is bad, but I love women that smoke 120's. It felt so exciting and erotitic. <br><br>I call my mother, literally mother nature, she inspired me and educated me from a young age about natural healing. After we'd been together about 8 months and, at times, he had tried to persuade me to try a cigarette, i'd got to the point where i was becoming quite irritable about him smoking. in my car, in my bathroom, at work, in the bathroom at my work, at school, in the bathroom at my school. Then eating my lunch in about 10 minutes. You want one, here.". She ate up the attention and I saw the window open, telling her she should get them longer and either the same polish or, yes, red, and that I'd even pay for them. I got curious, I bummed a cigarette at work a few times. Could you describe to us what it feels like to be fornicated by your boyfriend while inhaling smoke more extensively? He smokes socially/occasionally but was supportive at first and has become obsessed with my smoking too. The second kind of love is the patience of a loving parent in the midst of temper tantrum thrown by a sleepy, tempestuous child. Pose and puff without inhaling for your first cigarette, in front of a mirror, as you get used to it. I still love it. I love being a smoker. How many cigarettes did you smoke at that time? It's been 6 months and I keep our rules on two cigarette max on the days she smokes for me. I live in a self-imposed prison. Sitting outside drinking some beers and smoking a couple cigarettes. I started when I was 15. Needless to say, they moved in together and are both smoking 5 years later. By Terry Martin Nice storyits a pleasure to be able to guide someone to the pleasures of becoming a smoker. You tell me "I got these for you, My parents got divorced when I was 15. I don't either, really, but still get guilt feelings (a little) when I think that I was responsible for maybe giving him lung cancer in the distant future. Everytime I smell a cigarette I want to start smoking again so badly, Meat eaters disgust me. My girlfriend is 36, I am 55. If you are in need of help please contact people who care and please remember suicide is never the answer. I needed to understand. A. I could see her from where I was working, she stood out in the cold before going into the office puffing away on a Marlboro Red full flavor cork filter 100 cigarette. I told her that her new attitude was hot, that she'd make a great, sexy trophy girl for an older guy. (He gives great head!) Category Two often says that because they were able to drop it, I should too. I was so blind to my manipulations and scheming. Over time, smoking crept into every corner of her life. He was so sweet and never tried to change or judge me like my ex did. Most every thought that centered around moving next year involved a scene with me and his parents outside on the deck smoking together. He is a bit of a fitness fanatic. My story is the same. I was like woh, wow you look Hot ! I'm getting addicted, and I love it I've been smoking for about a month now, and three days with a new pack of Reds and they're taking their hold. I was scared at first but when she explained she knew for a while. The dream is to always be smoking. I want to do this so badly! Want to read confessions and comments uncensored? In fact, help him to INCREASE his intake! I was really anti smoking before I started. I felt very proud that I was sitting with my granny smoking my own cigaret. I got her to try menthols and now we have 1-2 cigs. I started smoking at age8 i saw it as sexy with the women 1968 im old i know still love it all the way matt, Nice way to seek validation that everything youre doing is right. Anyway, I've watched long time smokers die of COPD and cancer. Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email. My mom was a very sexy woman .and I can remember watching her. If you had told me what I was doing, I would have thought you were crazy! Thanks for being there and letting me reach out.~Kay~. and our For those of you who follow this blog, I'm sorry I haven't been updating it. Then, when the coast was clear, I'd come into the house and make a beeline for the bathroom for a frantic session of tooth brushing, mouthwash, and hand/face scrubbing. She was curious so she kept at it long enough that she started to enjoy it then stopped for a while. She is totally into it on her own big mistake, full on nicotine addiction. I finally felt like I could do it. It took me about 3-1/2 years before I noticed myself coughing in the morning when I awoke. I could smoke three more before they get home My smoking has created a huge gap that my husband isn't even aware of. Instead of having lunch, I used my dinner money to buy five cigarettes. I did. I'm smoking maybe 15 cigarettes a day -- not even a pack. I think we have something very special in common - a burning, smoke filled allure to cigarettes and the sensual pleasure and erotic desires that we ignite when we light up and pump our lungs fill with smoke. When she's not smoking a cigarette she's craving one cause she has an uneasy feeling every moment she's without her cigarettes. This became a revelation of who I have become, the kind of wife and mother I have been. Tobacco, Mon Amour. Perhaps it was. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Now we both love It. Anyway I started smoking socially again as that was the only way I could handle him smoking, I know that many people on here will think I am off my rocker and maybe I am a bit weird but for some reason while I was with him and I was smoking too I could tolerate the disgusting habit. I took several more inhales that night. I am happy that I started smoking and that, despite the propoganda, I sill do. Faiz Azfar, 18, a New York University student who rolls his own cigarettes, in Washington Square Park. Even a woman I hang with at the sports bar has done hers longer, and in a changing-color polish, at my suggestion. (I've been smoking secretly for a while so want to know what's in store if I commit fully). I am just beginning to realize what life with me must have been like for my family --constantly distracted, spending most of my time scurrying around, making sure they are settled, catering to their every whim because if they are involved in something else, I could go outside, thinking thatsurely they wouldn't look for me if their every need was met? my story of how i started smoking. Most women will do anything to please their men. I never saw it the way I just described it until the last few weeks. Every time I smoked, I would feel enormous guilt. My mom smoked Salem slim 100 at the time I finally decided i wanted to try one . I've haven't done that for a long time. 16 May 2011 I started smoking when I finally gave up trying to make my boyfriend stop smoking. But making my boyfriend eat me for long periods of time was pretty buzzy itself, and the smoking was fun in its own right. Like one sweet young woman I saw come out on her break and immediately she starts puffing away on this long strong cigarette and blowing these huge exhales of thick rich cigarette smoke. Or was it gradually getting addicted that pulled you into the deep? Out of the blue she told me, we'd been married about 6 years by then, that she was quitting. . Privacy Policy. There are so many things that are coming into focus regarding my affair with smoking. they will surely be of help. What do you have to get used to? You now smell like shit and have the habit of a crack whore. September 15, 2014. I hope you ate okay with it when he gets sick. Him being gone for a few weeks where I could smoke without "risk" sounded great My son and I will be arriving in July to spend the rest of summer there and then we will all return back home. Copyright The Student Room 2023 all rights reserved. He specializes in pulmonary health, critical care, and sleep medicine. I'm loving every second of it, I can see myself slowly becoming a full time smoker. The good news is the tobacco companies have been a bit sneaky about. I started smoking at 15, sneaking cigarettes from them when they weren't looking. Fortunately, you lowered your life expectancy and will probably die of cancer, all for some douchebag. Five days ago I didn't think so. About 6 months later we had a fight and she told me she really just wanted to smoke. It was better to never let the subject come up at all. 2023 Dotdash Media, Inc. All rights reserved. She light up and says "Do you like it ?". Did you ever try "holding in" once in a while your cravings so the next cigarette you smoke feels better? That dat she gave me some more puffs and she could see that I liked it. While numerous cross-sectional studies of adolescents have identified correlates of smoking initiation, much less prospective, longitudinal research has been conducted with young children to gather their accounts of early experiences of smoking, and this study fills that . She often wears high heels and short skirts whith a beautifull body. I don't smoke. Single. obviously by then i knew my wife didn't want to quit as much as i didn't and, 15 years later, we're both still smokers. It's a FIVE year old post you dick head. I make sure to tell her every time. If you do not receive your email shortly, please check your spam folder. try smoking a cig with your pussy. See how sexy you look smoking! And they weren't there. It seemed light most fetishists get off on the smell of it, and that made sense to me (every sense matters!) She allowed me to smoke openly since that day . i got her to try and she is now a smoker like me. Me, genuinely, not liking those cigarellos, opened up a window for her which i'm so happy happened. Content is reviewed before publication and upon substantial updates. One of them is the Hard Rock, my favorite! Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. I am starting to feel good about myself again.The nicotine withdrawal of the last 5 days has been physically tough: Nausea, sweats, headaches, and a feeling of emptiness. And a couple of months later, when he tentatively asked if I would be willing to light a cigarette, I said yes, that I would keep it lit as long as he gave me head. She loved her cigarettes so much she thoroughly loved nice big puffs on that long strong cigarette one after another before going in to work where she couldn't smoke. One of my ex boyfriends played a joke on me one night, it was playful, but still, he hid my cigarettes and, I'm half French. I have pooh-poohed travel ideas because I knew we would be together too much for me to smoke successfully and keep it hidden. Think : "I'm a sexy smoker". though which is good. This is the fifth day since I quit. That weekend, boom. I remember the sister was mad cause her friend came over and smoked a bunch of her cigarettes. I grew up knowing 2 sets of sisters that were smokers. Never really considered myself a smoker for a very long time, just as someone who happened to smoke sometimes.